I woke up this glorious New Years morning with an amazing cute little puppy licking my ear. He got a little playful and nipped me- next thing I know there is blood everywhere and my husband, (who has practically cut his finger tips OFF out in the garage and treated them with a car oil caked bandaid), tells me I may need stitches. If you don't know me, my ears are stretched almost 1.5 inches- the puppy got me on my lobe and according to witnesses there was a bit of the inside on the outside. White meat. The hubby flushed it with alcohol which was way more bearable than I thought it would be and I didn't bleed out so that was good. I will have to keep my plugs out though which sucks because my holey, floppy earlobes ain't cute.
Once I received adequate wound care I went to pee. Much to my surprise my urine was about the color of syrup which was alarming considering I'm drinking more now than I ever have in my life. Me and my anxiety disorder were certain it was a kidney shutdown so I did what all intelligent people do when they need answers and went straight to Google. Turns out it's all the beets I've been drinking. Carrots may have the same effect, so for anyone out there drinking their veggies do not be alarmed by kidney transplant colored urine.
I've finished my cup of hot lemon water now so it's time to make breakfast. The whole house smells like sausage and pancakes but I feel confident this morning and think I can manage juicing in the kitchen with all the breakfast treats hanging out. Until later, enjoy these photos of the bloodthirsty monster who pulled out my white meat!
12:35pm (AZ)- Currently at Jack in the Box, which isn't as painful as smelling the 4lb pork roast searing in the cast iron skillet at the house.
That baby along with a crapton of sauerkraut is chillin in the crockpot like a tasty beast. I'm guessing dinner time will suck the worst as the pattern has been. I think Starbucks, or any delicious coffee product is still at the top of my list of wants. When this is over I'm headed to my venti something or other and I'm gonna drink the S out of it. I can give up a lot of things but enormous chemically altered for flavor coffee at outrageous prices is not one of them. Anyway we are on our way to shoot some guns in the desert. I'm gonna pretend whatever I'm shooting at is my juicer and yell things like, "Clean yourself you lazy Jack!" Here, look at these:
5:53pm (AZ)- I'm hungry and I don't want anymore juice. I don't wanna juice dinner or clean up after juicing my dinner or drink juice for dinner. I don't wanna drink anything. No tea, no water. I have a headache and this house smells SO delicious that the air alone is making me angry. I made the kids peanut butter celery and I licked the spoon. I don't want this to be hard, I just want to be all alive and energized and disinterested in all the food that I know is so bad for me on so many levels. I wanna look at everyone shoving their faces with fried everything and waiting in line at buffets and judge them because being healthy is so easy for me. It isn't. It never has been and I feel sure it won't ever be. I know easy never got anyone anywhere but it sure is nice.
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